So here's the deal -- I really do have Blogger's Block. I've been tired for a long time. A really long time, almost a decade now. There are breaks, though; days, or weeks, when the fatigue recedes and I feel almost well. I haven't had one of those breaks -- not one lasting more than a day or so -- for over a year, and it's wearing me out. It's hard to feel creative, it's hard to feel optimistic.
Then I go through periods, as I have recently, of reading the news; watching the news; thinking and feeling about the news. I get heavier and heavier. My world gets darker -- even the dozens of baby sparrows in the garden do not lighten it. All those wings, and no lift.
So, I am grouchy and grumpy and edgy. I promised a friend to make an appointment to see my doctor, which I will do tomorrow. But that won't change the news, now, will it? I'm going to be like that squirrel for awhile -- my eyes are closed; I can't see you and you can't see me.
Some Rights Reserved
Grim. No platitudes from me. I understand.
Don't know if this will work for you, but how I deal with this stuff is: turn the news off and wrap myself up in gentle things until the crap lifts. Good books. Soft clothing. Old films. Healthy food. Wise friends.
No bloody news. It doesn't need me. It'll carry on without me.
Thinking of you.
Posted by: David Bridger | 26 August 2005 at 02:17 AM
"Then I go through periods, as I have recently, of reading the news; watching the news; thinking and feeling about the news. I get heavier and heavier. My world gets darker -- even the dozens of baby sparrows in the garden do not lighten it. All those wings, and no lift."
I find the news tends to do this to a person. Reading all the bad stuff all the time sends me in a funk too. Keep your head up.
Posted by: Sarpy Sam | 26 August 2005 at 04:43 AM
Hope you feel better soon. This sounds like depression, organic. There is help for that.
Thanks for the wonderful women's blogger links.
ginger~
Posted by: gingerivers | 26 August 2005 at 07:47 AM
I understand. Thanks for saying so we don't fret the silence and can trust you are healing, finding all the right food for the soul, detoxifying, finding that inner pilot light until it ignites as bright as it used to be again.
More stuff you already know...If the first doctor doesn't find anything, next doctor. The mind-body has a capacity to heal, easier once obstructions are less obstructive. Take care. I'll check back from time to time.
Posted by: Pearl | 26 August 2005 at 10:27 AM
Go ahead an take a rest or vacation. You deserved it
Posted by: Cathy | 26 August 2005 at 01:15 PM
Oh Sharon, I know that turning off the TV & putting the papers aside doesn't change the news - but at least not constantly being reminded may help.
I'm so buried in busy-ness - I hardly have time to think. . .
Posted by: Karen | 27 August 2005 at 08:57 AM
That's why I don't watch or listen to the news anymore. I may be ignorant of the issues but at least I feel better.
Posted by: Pandora | 27 August 2005 at 04:48 PM
I hope the funk at least passes, even if you don't discover some more energy. Mine is very up and down again - time to just concentrate on what's central I think. Not something I'm good at...
I've just been catching up here and over on Abide and see you have an iBook. Lovely.
Posted by: Michael Nobbs | 28 August 2005 at 12:58 AM
All those wings, and no lift.
You forget about the lift we get from reading passages like this.
Posted by: Dave | 28 August 2005 at 05:05 AM
I understand too and will miss you. Summer blues are particularly horrid. I hope the Doc will help.
Posted by: Anna | 28 August 2005 at 07:56 AM
I turned off the TV
(and news)
some nine ten years
ago
along with
everything else on TV
and stoppe reading
the newly newws mags
since only the names changed
not the news
tremendous waste of time
reading about things
where I can have no impact at all
Posted by: suzanne | 29 August 2005 at 03:50 PM
Sending love and prayers your way. Stay well and stay safe
Posted by: Neha. | 30 August 2005 at 12:21 PM